I have been putting off writing this letter to you because that means it’s time — time for you to leave for college. It’s the time you probably have been looking forward to all year, and it’s the time I have dreaded for months, probably, even since the day you were born. These years have gone by way too fast.
I remember when I was little, people would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up. My answer? “A mom”. You gave me the first shot at this thing called motherhood and you have taught me so much about it.
You’re still teaching me some “firsts” about motherhood – I’m learning that motherhood isn’t finite. Maybe you don’t crawl into my lap anymore or ask me to open Capri Sun’s for you, but you ask me to go to dinner with you and to watch the Office and I’m grateful. You’re teaching me motherhood isn’t just for the ages of babies and toddlers, it’s forever.
I’ve also learned as a parent that life is one long series of letting go: watching you learn to crawl, then walk and talk, then run, then drive away, and now – leave for college. When I look at you, I see a big heart and a faith that can and will do big things.
It seems like yesterday you were signing all the worship songs in the back seat of our van and I was wiping the lunch off your face. All those times you’d look up at me and smile and I’d think, “It doesn’t get any better than this.” While those days are so, so sweet and hold a special place, I’m finding out that it does get better. You have grown up and become a great man and an amazing friend, and your smile still lights up my world.
Nothing will ever be the same as it has been for our crew (and a little bit of that is hard to digest if I’m being honest. Maybe not a little, but a lot). It gives me a huge lump in my throat to write that out and to think about it. We will miss you at the dinner table, and I will wait for you to come through the front door after being with friends – only you won’t now. But, we were never meant to raise you to keep you. I know this is how it’s supposed to be. I love you and I’m trying to let go. You are one of my favorite people and as excited as I am for your next step, I’m going to miss you tremendously.
Please remember:
- We love you so much and no matter what.
- Don’t ever feel ashamed if you need to come home. Ever.
- I will probably cry every time we drop you off at school and again when you come home for breaks and leave again, so just get ready.
- Love Jesus, always and show God’s love.
- We will always encourage you and cheer you on. We will be there at every turn possible to embrace your successes, support your learning when you make mistakes, and provide a soft place to land when and if you need it.
- My heart will always skip a beat when I see your number come up on my phone and I will feel like a little kid on Christmas morning waiting for you to arrive home for a visit.
- When and if you say “Are you coming, Mom?” – know that as often as possible, for as long as possible, my answer will be “Yes, I’m coming. I’ll be there soon.”
- Choose your partner wisely and date someone at least through all the seasons before seriously settling down (what great advice that your grandmother gave me). If you find that “love” is causing you to compromise your values, then examine it closely. Loving someone means your values align together and you can see yourself working hard for the rest of your life to stay with that person. Find someone worthy of your love and then put in the work that defines a loving relationship. If someone is worth that effort over and over again, then you’re on the right track.
We are here for you, always. You’ve got this, Son. I love you more than you’ll ever know…
—Mom
- You can see more of the journey of launching our oldest and what it’s been like for everyone in the family, HERE
- You can check out all the College Essentials if you’re shopping for your child who is leaving for college, HERE
- I’ve created an Instagram account called The Parent Pivot just for those of us who are in the season of pivoting into this new season of life with our kids – I hope you’ll join me over there.
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